McDonald’s Asking for Free Business Advice at SXSW

Well, this is exciting news! Corporate burger behemoth McDonald’s, which has apparently been hurting for new ideas, has come up with an innovative new tech solution: They’re heading to the South by Southwest festival in Austin. So hip!

But they’re not just attending, according to Quartz:

McDonald’s will be a prominent sponsor, and it hopes to come away with more than just whatever goodwill it can generate among conference goers who take advantage of the McCafé coffee, ‘music-based experiences,’ and ‘salon-based programming’ at the ‘McDonald’s Lounge’ on site.

It wants ideas.

Yes! That’s right. Their newest strategy, after recently asking random customers to pay for their meals by dancing or hugging someone instead of with money, is to ask people attending SXSW to come up with new business ideas for them, for free, in a series of “pitch sessions.”

Guess even paying poverty-level wages is too expensive for them sometimes. McDonald's say the kinds of cool, futuristic business ideas they’re looking for are things like having drones deliver burgers to people who are driving on the freeway (no joke).

Well, we’re glad you asked, McDonald’s! And we’re here to help you out. We’ve brainstormed some innovative business ideas that your multibillion-dollar company can use for free…

• Pay your employees living wages. Why not start at, oh, $15 an hour? That’s a fresh new trend in cool cities like Seattle. (Bonus: Millennials love ethical brands!)

• Respect your workers’ right to organize for better working conditions. It’s a great idea—and it’s also the law.

Or, maybe more your speed...

• A McDonald's reality show. In Real World McDonald's, seven or eight McDonald's workers are chosen to live together—not in a mansion, but in a two-bedroom apartment. Because that's all they can afford on a McDonald's paycheck.

Anyone else have any hot business ideas for McDonald’s? Tweet ’em at us at @workingwa or submit one below.

—Anna, Working Washington